This is my 200th post. It is hard to believe that there are 200 bits of my life and family on the Internet for just anyone to stumble upon. As crazy as it is to think about that, blogging is a wonderful thing. It is my lifeline. When my husband left our home to start his new job in Far, Far Away over a year ago, I didn't realize what an impact losing the only adult conversation in my life would have. It was loneliness like I had never felt before.
I was already reeling from leaving the workforce in favor of staying home full time. I lost many friends when I left the working world. We tried for awhile to stay in touch, but the lunches out, which we had used to connect were a thing of the past, and phone conversations in a quiet car on the commute home were gone forever. It was just a matter of time.
When my husband left, our baby at the time wasn't even three months old and I was already pregnant again. It was an incredibly difficult time. I was exhausted. We were just beginning to come to terms with the unusual behaviour our then two year old son was exhibiting. I was waking up several times a night with our daughter (still am, as a matter of fact) and the fatigue associated with pregnancy was hitting me hard, but, I didn't know what to attribute it to yet.
Then my husband fell ill. Not even two months into his new job he fell ill and had to return home for a couple of weeks in order to have surgery. It was yet another stumbling block in our path that made me question if God himself, wasn't trying to tell us we had made a mistake taking this job. My husband, barely recovered, left the children and myself alone again, and reported back for duty.
Then I came across a blog, this blog. It gave me hope. You see, at the time the author was raising her four children with a husband who was also working out of town. Her blog gave me hope. There was someone else like me. She was making do, so I could too. She was the one who encouraged me to start my own blog, so that I could have an outlet for words and emotions that I hadn't anyone at home to share them with. I will be eternally grateful for this.
That blog led me to another one. This one. Here I found a Catholic, liberal, mother of five, just like I was at the time.* Her sarcasm smacks of my own and though she is far more eloquent than I could ever hope to be, I felt even less alone.
Over the course of the last 200 posts, I have seen my then three month old walk, I have given birth to another daughter, we've adopted two dogs, had two children in casts, had a near death experience, dealt with possible unemployment, reconnected with my grandparents, sent a child to middle school, and embarked on a journey to help our three year old. How could this all have taken place in just over a year?
The Bloggy World allows me to interact with other adults in a way that otherwise I would not. I am not a very social creature in real life. I don't make friends easily, and those that I do make, I keep forever. It is just my way. In Bloggy World, I can be a pseudo social butterfly, I can comment on a stranger's blog without a moment of embarrassment, IRL, I would probably be loathe to do more than meet your eyes and nod.
Thank you Bloggy World for letting me carve my own little space. Thank you guys for reading, and mostly for writing. The stories you all share, are the ones that renew my faith in family life and sometimes in myself, and of course, they make me laugh. Laughter is the best medicine after all.
*Still Catholic, still liberal...just more kids.
5 days ago