I'm no Jackson Browne

Over at Knuclehead's there is a blog off going on. Over at Homemaker Man Manor, there are unofficial entries being written to amuse us, his readers. Here at the Proud House, I couldn't help myself and I decided to chime in with a parody of my own. Here it is folks.


Ready or Not, lyrics by me

Someone's gonna have to explain it to me
I'm not sure how it happened
My baby's leaving in the morning
And he's having trouble packing up his jeans
His time away keeps getting longer
Although he always comes back home
I guess we'll reach some understanding,
When we see what the future will bring

I met him in a little restaurant,
One of those typical Italian scenes
I gave him my very best come on
And he had no trouble getting into my jeans
Then we were constant companions,
I marveled at his dignity,
Soon he told me that he loved me
And he made a home with me

My baby's leaving in the morning
He says he's got a lot on his mind
They sure didn't give me any warning
That he was gonna be gone all the time

He says he doesn't care if he never spends a
Another night on his own
He wants to be a father
Take a look in my eyes and tell me brother
does it look like I'm ready

I told him I had never lived alone
And probably never would
All I wanted was a companion
And he told me that he understood
But he wanted a new career
A dream come true of his own
Next thing I remember he was packing up
And leaving to be out on his own

My baby's leaving in the morning
He says he's got a lot on his mind
They sure didn't give me any warning
That he was gonna be gone all the time

Bless my soul he's got a new job and he's living somewhere else all alone
Bless my soul he's got a new job and he's living somewhere else all alone


************

Jackson Browne's original Ready or Not

Someone's going to have to explain it to me
I'm not sure what it means
My baby's feeling funny in the morning
She's having trouble getting into her jeans
Her waist-line seems to be expanding
Although she never feels like eating a thing
I guess we'll reach some understanding
When we see what the future will bring

I met her in a crowded barroom
One of those typical Hollywood scenes
I was doing my very best Bogart
But I was having trouble getting into her jeans
I punched an unemployed actor
Defending her dignity
He stood up and knocked me through that barroom door
And that girl came home with me

Now baby's feeling funny in the morning
She says she's got a lot on her mind
Nature didn't give her any warning
Now she's going to have to leave her wild ways behind
She says she doesn't care if she never spends
Another night running loose on the town
She's gonna be a mother
Take a look in my eyes and tell me brother
If I look like I'm ready

I told her I had always lived alone
And I probably always would
And all I wanted was my freedom
And she told me that she understood
But I let her do some of my laundry
And she slipped a few meals in between
And the next thing I remember, she was all moved in
And I was buying her a washing machine

My baby's feeling funny in the morning
She says she's got a lot on her mind
Nature didn't give her any warning
But she's feeling better about it all the time
She says she's ready for some meaning
After all of her running around
Well bless my soul, she's got a rock-and-roll bandman
Thinking 'bout settling down