Saturday, February 21, 2009

A little neighborly love...or not

My family and I live in a townhouse. There is a shared wall on each side of our humble abode. On one side, there lives a woman who tends to be VERY extremely unpleasant every time our paths cross. On the other lives a young mom and her two children. While I wish that the neighbor on my left would be a little friendlier, she causes us no real problems . She does however raise hamsters, and I find myself singing that Jimmy Buffett song whenever I see her. I am drifting off topic though, the young mother on my right is what I would like to talk about.

This is a young woman, all of 22, with two small girls. She has a 5 year old and a 3 year old. She is currently going through divorce proceedings with the children's father. I can understand as a mother who married very young and started her family very young that she feels compelled to sow her oats a bit. I get that. What I am a whole lot less understanding about is the constant partying. I feel like I am trying to raise my family in the basement of a frat house.

There is music that blares at all hours of the day and night. There is the screaming, yelling, and impromptu drunken karaoke. There are the cigarette butts and beer bottles that are all over the drive. There is the scuff on my bumper that wasn't there when I parked, but magically appeared when your drunken guest peeled out of here. There is the broken glass from the beer bottles that get thrown or run over. So far, I have had to pick it out of my daughter's hands when she fell on her skates and my dogs' paws. There is the puppy that gets chucked outside for hours so that she can sleep in, who barks non stop, causes my dogs to bark and ensures that there is no rest for the weary in my home.

As much as all these things bother me, I am bothered most by the two little girls, one in school already that have to live through it. When I see her children run outside at 2:00 in the morning looking for her, it makes me sad. Then it makes me mad, because I can't imagine what school must be like for her the next day. I am the last person who will judge a Mommy or a Daddy because they are drinking beer in front of their children. I will however shed actual tears when I see a mother stumble and fall and alternatively feel up today's boyfriend while her children look on. I wish that I could shake her, tell her that once she loses her children's respect there is no getting it back. I want to tell her that she will have the whole rest of her life to drink and party if that is what she wants, but, that she'll only have her children for a little while. One day soon, maybe I will tell her. Our friendly acquaintance is already a thing of the past, what have I got to lose?


  1. That sounds dreadful. It must be hard to have your kids see that. You could talk to the young mom...or you could just slap her up side the head. They might be equally effective with her, but the latter would be so much more satisfying for you!

  2. That is a hard situation. I would certainly not think twice about saying something about the things that are effecting you and your family. The broken glass etc.
    It is harder to know when to intervene in regards to the poor parenting. If the kids are in danger. I would speak up. Actually, I am the type that would probably offer to baby-sit so she could do her thing, because I would be afraid of a big confrontation.

  3. I am hoping that she pulls herself out of it, she fell into it pretty out of the blue, but I am at this very moment listening to roughly 20 people dancing and partying OUTSIDE my front door. I have five children of my own and there is NO WAY that I would offer to watch hers. Kim you really are too sweet (meant in a total *I am in awe of you* way)