Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Why I need coffee in order to live

Lots of random thoughts which I have attempted to at least put in complete sentences...

Today I managed to go until almost 4:00 p.m. without coffee. All day I felt awful, horrible, terrible. I dragged myself to the coffee bar. I ordered a blended beverage with six shots of espresso, ten minutes later I had regained the will to live. The expensive B vitamins I bought? Nada. Coffee, people. Coffee is where it is at.

I did the unforgivable today. I spanked my child in public. Yes. I did. On his hand, at the wholesale club. Why? For spitting soda in his sister's eyes just for the hell of it. I'm not proud of myself...I am even less proud of him. His antics are getting old and I am quickly tiring of the games.

My husband got a call today...a concerned call. The guy he worked for when he was TDY called to say that he had received several calls in the past few days asking about my husband. He just wanted to let him know that he and the Resident Engineer told the callers that my husband's work was exemplary and that they would love to have him back. He called my husband in case he wasn't already aware of the shit storm brewing. To me this says that at the very least HR, and most likely HR and the district boss man are actually looking into my husband's claims and that maybe...just maybe, we are still in the game. After the call came in today, for the first time since walking through the door Friday, my husband stopped clutching his chest and actually smiled. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. The guy also inferred that if it came right down to it, that he would hire him to work for their district. I am cautiously optimistic.

It is time for me to fess up. One of the things that has bothered me most over the past year is that my husband's boss reminds me of me. Little patience, very structured, the 'book' is gospel, can't see shades of gray, a micro manager, total workaholic, doesn't settle for less than perfection. I was that kind of boss lady. I can usually tell when my husband is going to have a problem at work. The indicator tends to be when I like the boss. My own kindred spirit is my husband's worst enemy. Who knew?

My oldest child brought a friend home with him last night. I like this friend. He is a respectful, kind young man, or at least that is my impression of him. Last night though, he came over with approval from his mom to spend the night. On a school night. Huh? Apparently, when his mom called to ask when he was going to come home, this young man told his mom that he wasn't coming home because we had invited him to spend the night. He was joking with his mother and assumed that she was going to tell him that he had better think again, or something along those lines, but, instead she said 'okay' and he was too embarrassed to tell her that it was supposed to have been a joke. I didn't want to make him feel any worse than he already did, so I let him stay. I am floored though that his mother would approve of anything like that, and without speaking to me, or even ever having 'met' me as opposed to waving as she drives by. I am choosing to believe that maybe there was something going on at home last night that this mom would have preferred her son not be a part of, and that she trusted that if we were awful people, that she would have noticed a couple of years ago when the boys first started hanging out.

Today Whole Foods put a whole bunch of organic clothing on clearance. $10 for sweatshirts, tees, polos, and pajamas. Anticipating my husband forgetting my birthday tomorrow, I treated myself (and him actually) to a couple of new things. I saved $70 on the pajamas alone. I love, love, love a sale!

I got a Halloween door hanger today in the dollar section at Target that is in the shape of a witch's hat. It reads, "the witch is...," and can be changed to read "in" or "out" and my children are greatly amused by it. Each time I've slipped into a grumpy mood, one of my precious offspring has brought the sign indoors and dramatically changed the out to in.

My husband fixed the deadbolt on our front door. Today when we got home from Costco, my husband had to lift our seven year old through the kitchen window to let us in the house because our keys wouldn't undo the lock. I assure you all that he is much more handy with duct tape than with any other tool. Bright and early tomorrow morning he will have to overcome his ineptitude with all things 'hardware' and change out our locks. He pleaded for just one more chance to fix the lock, but, I vetoed his pleas and bought a new one at my least favorite store...Lowe's. Not that Lowe's has ever done anything to me. They just happen to be the closest hardware store, and me? I hate them all. I am a woman though, so unlike my husband, I can get away with it.

My social life begins at the elementary school and ends at the grocery store. I have been hugged most recently by a cashier back from medical leave and a lunch lady. I know whose husband is celebrating a new job after two years out of work, I know whose son has a football game, and who will come cut my grass because they feel sorry for me. I. Need. A. Life. I need to converse with people that aren't getting paid for the pleasure. Seriously.


  1. Ha! I was going through my phone organizing names today. Then I realized 90% of my phone entries are coded "A" for Athena's friends, or "W" for work.

    That is sad.

  2. Love the random thoughts. Just please promise you will never, ever again, try to go without coffee. It's just not right. What were you thinking, woman?

  3. Back before I knew about blogging and we had moved somewhere different just for a year? I would strike up a conversation with absolutely anyone, I was so desperate. You know those people at the Lands End 1-800 number? They are very nice.

    The job situation sounds hopeful! Thank goodness...

  4. It's not unforgivable to smack a child's hand in public. At least, I sure hope not!

  5. I hope the job thing works out - you need to catch a break there. And you totally need a date night, or a girls night out.

  6. Your life sounds pretty cool to me. But I hear what you're saying. My only friends these days are the behaviour therapists that work in my home with my boys. My chiropractor and my postman- who I rush to the door for, to have some grown-up conversation.