Tuesday, April 6, 2010


Think Tank Momma

Dear Loving Family,

Thank you, it was wonderful that you talked to me about what to put in the Easter eggs for Hercules. I even lowered my standards and agreed to let him have conventional stuff as long as it was free of red dye, HFCS, and gluten. Sweetarts, Skittles, and Nerds DO NOT meet those criteria.

We talked about gluten free jelly beans, and gummy worms, lollipops and the like. We talked about where to find them, etc. Imagine my surprise when I am being pulled in ten different directions only to find my son chowing down on Nerds.

It isn't about you having to meeting H's needs, I don't expect that, it is about *telling me* you had changed the game plan. The next four hours that he spent as the 'child from hell?' Remember how impatient and pissy his behavior made you? Uh, it was your fucking fault. The fact that my day was ruined by it, lingering long into the night? That really sucked. It sucks even more that you blame him.

Next year when I tell you that we can't come, I hope you'll understand.




Dear The Little Lady,

You are going to be two in July. Sleep through the night already!!! Being up all night, every night is kicking my ass. You wake up your sister, who takes over when you finally sleep, and the combination is totally draining me. This two hours of sleep a night that isn't even consecutive, is rendering me useless.

I can't function like this. Prisoners of war have been broken by less intense sleep deprivation. Give me a break. I'm not sure how much longer I can go on like this.


Mommy, Momma, Mommia, MOMMMMMMYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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  1. Seriously?! I think you should have left him there with all his contraband candy overnight. Some people just don't get it - it's not about parents being mean or anal, it's about parents looking out for the best interest of their children. Keep on keeping on, mom. You're doing a good job.

  2. I am so sorry they did that to him...and to you. Some people just don't understand.

  3. I understand your pain...we went through similar strife this easter re: being lactose free. I hope you get some sleep soon!!!

  4. We make a great pair you and I. I think between the two of us we might, maybe get a full 8 hours of sleep a week!

    Sleep deprivation may have caused me to have less family members if they pulled that stunt with my baby boy! Just sayin'!

  5. People don't get dietary needs. They think it's just a big over-played thing, and its, like, you know, serious. Sometimes life-or-death.

    Sheesh, people.

  6. Completely sucks about the Easter candy. I think too often people don't realize exactly how diet can affect behavior especially if they don't deal with it or it affects their life on a daily basis.

    Good luck with the 2yr old. I remember those days. One week I just gave up. kept my son up all day long. I mean I wouldn't let him nap. At. All. It was hard, lots and LOTS of crying and fit throwing. Yet it was worth it once he finally got the idea night time was for sleeping.

  7. Viv ~ those darn babies and their demanding ways! my co-worker is a walking zombie most days too....I finally prescribed her tylenol PM and said, you'll sleep right through her 4:00 a.m. wake up call....and if she gets real rowdy, you'll sleep through your HUSBAND getting out of bed to handle this one! It's his turn anyway right?

    However in YOUR case, the hubby's not there, so that won't work for you, so I will be thinking up a tactic that will work in your situation. one that does NOT include drugging the baby, i think Children Services frown upon that, even though i know for a fact that back in the olden days people used to dip kids pacifiers in whiskey for teething babies! mmmhmmmmm....where was Children Services then huh?!

    thinking of you,